the wonderful bastard offspring of David Attenborough and Monty Python --but yet completely Nathan. the more Dada far out you go, the more I fall in line. Inuits in ice trays. now that's what substack is for!
Thank you. It started as something for a comments section and then I spent enough time playing with it that I saw a post there. Sunday 12pm it's back to doom and gloom. Haha.
I’m delighted to have found you and discovered the Bainbridge connection. We were south island on West Blakely which was the street that descended around the big turn right after the elementary school headed south. We loved living there, and, on a completely unrelated note, I was the founder of the New Year’s Day Polar Bear Club (12PM sharp on 1/1), my one permanent gift to BI. :-)
Yes, i know exactly where you mean. Such a nice area! We lived on the north end--my house was on Euclid and every New Year's Day I'd watch my (now ex) husband and kids jump into Port Madison bay! (I was the holder-of-the-towels.) I miss the island but know it's not what it used to be.
Wow, this one was really cool! It reminds me of an episode of Love, Death + Robots called Ice Age, in which a lost civilization takes over a young couple’s fridge.
It's cute. I may be resurrecting Tippi Pointier soon of "Ask Tip!" She has a new job (I think she's out of the gratuities business) and (I think, don't hold me to it), she'll have a letter from the wife of a newbie birding enthusiast.
This is crazy wonderful. I thought the final reveal at the end would include an alien on another planet, at the check out counter🛍️🐻❄️.
I don’t know why, but Sea Monkeys popped into my head. Here’s a quick blurb of what I found;
Included in the package , entitled “ World’s Only Instant Pets” along with the Sea Monkeys, an ocean tank and feeding spoon.
“The main ingredient of sea monkey food is algae, so if you don't have the packet, feed them algae pellets or grow algae.”
A satisfied, then unsatisfied customer;
“That is until a couple of years later when the biggest one started hogging all of the food, resulting in the others dying until he was the only one left…Then he died of old age and also possibly loneliness.”
Wait there’s more;
Turns out the inventor was a white supremacist, he “bought weapons for the Ku Klux Klan and regularly attended neo-Nazi groups.”
If I had to choose one, I’m going with the Polar Bears and Inuits, Puffins and Tundra grass.
I remember those Sea Monkeys. They were advertised with cartoon pictures that were incredibly appealing. I think my brother or I might have ordered them at one point and we were incredibly disappointed. I think the bigger inspiration on this was the Dead Parrot sketch from Monty Python where this insanely absurd situation is treated as completely logical.
the wonderful bastard offspring of David Attenborough and Monty Python --but yet completely Nathan. the more Dada far out you go, the more I fall in line. Inuits in ice trays. now that's what substack is for!
Yes! Yes! Dead 🦜! 💯
This is great. I feel like there should be a whole subgenre of disgruntled customers of enchanted goods.
“Enchanted goods.” Perfect. I wouldn’t object to that subgenre. There’s something Harry Potter-ish about it.
Next week: About those missing puffins ... 🥶
Hilarious. Thank goodness we live in the age of returnable merchandise.
Nothing is more aggravating than polar bears getting in the milk.
Haha, I was thinking the same thing.
Or maybe the puffins will show up months down the road :)
oh, i so, so hope they come after the warranty period.
Puffins in the cereal box, polar bears in the milk.
Dead brilliant treat straight out of left field.
<tip> 🎩 </tip>
"I may have to speak to my manager if you defrosted the Inuits." Because he'll have to report it to the nearest Canadian Consulate.
You’ll need to set up the Canadian Consulate Kit first and defrost the ice chest of Royal Mounties.
This is gold 💛
💛
Thanks for posting this block of pure JOY xxx
You’ve just added to it.
This was so delightful. 😁💖
Thank you. It started as something for a comments section and then I spent enough time playing with it that I saw a post there. Sunday 12pm it's back to doom and gloom. Haha.
Well, it reads like a fully formed idea that was beautifully executed. 👏
I look forward to future passing thoughts turned into gold.
Love this story! And thank you for the shout out! Really happy to have you over at What Now.
I’m delighted to have found you and discovered the Bainbridge connection. We were south island on West Blakely which was the street that descended around the big turn right after the elementary school headed south. We loved living there, and, on a completely unrelated note, I was the founder of the New Year’s Day Polar Bear Club (12PM sharp on 1/1), my one permanent gift to BI. :-)
Yes, i know exactly where you mean. Such a nice area! We lived on the north end--my house was on Euclid and every New Year's Day I'd watch my (now ex) husband and kids jump into Port Madison bay! (I was the holder-of-the-towels.) I miss the island but know it's not what it used to be.
Oh my God, that was great. Not what I was expecting. Love it!
Thanks, Ben. I know it was a little different from my usual fare (but maybe everybody needed a breather.) 😀
Wow, this one was really cool! It reminds me of an episode of Love, Death + Robots called Ice Age, in which a lost civilization takes over a young couple’s fridge.
Thank you! Now on my list!
I beg you to do prompt 39 next
It's cute. I may be resurrecting Tippi Pointier soon of "Ask Tip!" She has a new job (I think she's out of the gratuities business) and (I think, don't hold me to it), she'll have a letter from the wife of a newbie birding enthusiast.
Oh, that pleases me greatly. I’ve missed Tippi…
You had me a tiny polar bears! 🐻❄️ This was such a bizarre and fun little romp.
Thanks, Ben. And thanks for the picture. As I'm sure you've seen it has already replaced the initial picture. I need to get you on retainer.
Ha!!!!!! Great c
Thanks, Mark. A little something light-hearted. Did you notice the Dead Parrot sketch in there at all?
Loved this, Adam! Once again, I’m inspired. (Currently working on the one-sentence story.) Now, I want some levity over in the Rolling Desk!!
I don't do levity in extended posts, so keep this one close at hand. I need to get back to your last post. Intense.
🥰
This is crazy wonderful. I thought the final reveal at the end would include an alien on another planet, at the check out counter🛍️🐻❄️.
I don’t know why, but Sea Monkeys popped into my head. Here’s a quick blurb of what I found;
Included in the package , entitled “ World’s Only Instant Pets” along with the Sea Monkeys, an ocean tank and feeding spoon.
“The main ingredient of sea monkey food is algae, so if you don't have the packet, feed them algae pellets or grow algae.”
A satisfied, then unsatisfied customer;
“That is until a couple of years later when the biggest one started hogging all of the food, resulting in the others dying until he was the only one left…Then he died of old age and also possibly loneliness.”
Wait there’s more;
Turns out the inventor was a white supremacist, he “bought weapons for the Ku Klux Klan and regularly attended neo-Nazi groups.”
If I had to choose one, I’m going with the Polar Bears and Inuits, Puffins and Tundra grass.
I remember those Sea Monkeys. They were advertised with cartoon pictures that were incredibly appealing. I think my brother or I might have ordered them at one point and we were incredibly disappointed. I think the bigger inspiration on this was the Dead Parrot sketch from Monty Python where this insanely absurd situation is treated as completely logical.